13 JOKES I GOT IN MY (OFFICE) MAIL
1. What is the difference between stress, tension and panic?
Stress is when your WIFE is pregnant, Tension is when your GIRLFRIEND is pregnant and Panic is when BOTH are pregnant.
2. Teacher: (In an English class) Do you know the importance of a period?
Kid: Yes, maam. My sister said she has missed one and my mom fainted, dad got a heart attack and our driver ran away!
3. Mother to her teenage daughter: I think this is the right time we should talk about sex.
Teenage daughter: (Excitingly) Sure mom, tell me what do you want to know?
4. What is the definition of Mistress?
Someone between the Mister and the Mattress.
5. Man comes home, finds his wife with his friend in bed. Man shoots his friend. Wife says, “If you behave like this, you will lose ALL your friends.”
6. Son asks the difference between confidence and confidential. Dad says, you are my son, I am confident. Your friend is also my son, that’s confidential.
7. Husband asks, “Do you know the meaning of wife?” It means Without Information Fighting Everytime!
Wife replies, “No, it means, With Idiot For Eternity”
8. After a quarrel, a husband said to his wife, “You know, I was a fool when I married you.” She replied, “Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn’t notice.”
9. A little boy asked his father, “Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?” And the father replied, “I don’t know son, I’m still paying.”
10. Wife : Honey …… What are You Looking for ?
Husband : Nothing.
Wife : Nothing…?? U’ve been reading our marriage certificate 4 an hour …??
Husband : I was just looking 4 the expiry date.
11. Young Son: Is it true, Dad, that in some parts of Africa or India, a man doesn’t know his wife until he marries her?
Dad: That happens in every country, son.
12. My girlfriend told me I should be more affectionate. So I got myself two girlfriends
13. A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word. An earlier discussion had led to an argument and neither of them wanted to concede their position. As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs, the husband asked sarcastically,
“Relatives of yours?”
“Yep,” the wife replied , “in-laws”.
jahon (6)
Grace (5)
Kayla @ TheEclecticElement (4)
Maribeth (2)
Raycillient (2)
{ 18 comments… read them below or add one }
It sounds like a real boy’s club at your office!
Stacey’s last blog post..Nothin’ but Noodles
I don’t miss these joke emails now that I’m working from home. Happy TT.
LOL! Men!
Cheers
Jewelz
Deb’s last blog post..Thursday Thirteen – Kids games edition
MEN!
Charlotte (Charmed Life)’s last blog post..Blog Awards
this sure woke me up
I love #7
shiera’s last blog post..Thursday Thirteen #11
I really have to laugh at 13. Too funny.
Wendy’s last blog post..Thankful Thursday – Fellowship
Bold and Free’s last blog post..Thirteen Things to do in Colorado in January #5
LOL! I’ve received several of these emails, too!
Darla’s last blog post..Sticky Post: Contest!
LMAO…too funny. Thanks for the giggles. Happy TT and thanks for stopping by.
Lori’s last blog post..TT #48
I like 8 and 13 the best.
Robin’s last blog post..Tea for Two – Giveaway Days are Here Again
These will be passed along properly, thanks!
Rian Fike’s last blog post..Thursday Thirteen: The Greatest Television Show of All Time.
What a fun idea! Great jokes too. Usually I don’t like these because they can be so negative. I actually laughed!! Well done!
Happy TT!
A-mew-zing!
Gandalf & Grayson’s last blog post..Thursday Thirteen #3 – 13 Approved Methods to Spoil the Gray Boys
kewl…:)
save the best for last jud ba…(in-laws
)
rose’s last blog post..the reason for her heartbreak
Thanks for the laugh! Especially the last one.
Very interesting read.